Spring has come early in the Northwest, and so has a flood of annoying recruiters. Recruiters aren’t the best for anyone looking for a career, so I’ve taken the liberty of breaking down the phrases I’ve found in some of the job postings. Without further ado, I present a front end developer’s guide to reading job postings!
“Work hard, play hard"
Translation: Workaholic culture is the norm, we’re chained to our desks and when/if set free, we drink ourselves silly to forget the fact we’re over-worked and underpaid.
"Work life integration"
Translation: We have no respect for work/life separation. Expect to work 65 hours a week and a divorce/break up or to remain single. You’re better off serving Lattes for a living.
"Rockstar”
Translation: We have unreasonable expectations in your abilities.
“True Startup”
Translation: Expect mismanagement.
“Excellent benefits”
Translation: Average benefits.
“Highly competitive benefits package”
Translation: Has 401k.
“highly skilled” / “problem solver”
Translation: Personal capable of working unsupervised.
“strong experience”
Translation: Actually did this at your last job.
“motivated”
Translation: Shows up on time to work/meetings.
“Full Stack”
Translation: Unrealistic qualifications at not enough salary.
“kick-ass team”
Translation: Our team, but we think it sounds cooler.
“reinventing”
Translation: Incrementally improving.
“Lean”
Translation: Understaffed.
“gig”
Translation: Job, but we think it sounds cooler.
“fast-paced”
Translation: Dead line oriented.
“world-class”
Translation: Unlikely.
“Quickly build prototypes”
Translation: Use CSS frameworks.
“Work directly”
Translation: Open office floor plan.
“mobile optimization”
Translation: Probably isn’t using resolution independent images yet but would like to.
“UX design principles”
Translation: Not really a UX job.
“highly interactive”
Translation: We miss Flash.
“client-facing”
Translation: Expect phone support with our clients
“responsive design”
Translation: Web design, post 2010.
“Java”
Translation: Not really a front end job.
“disruptive”
Translation: Business as usual.
“end-of-year holiday party”
Translation: Mandatory.
“social web”
Translation: The part where people spam each other things.
“key stakeholders”
Translation: The people who have the money.
“native JavaScript”
Translation: Without JQuery.
“ES6”
Translation: See native javascript.
“learning by doing"
Translation: Shiny new libraries are preferred.
"Scala”
Translation: More than a front end job.
“Ember, Angular, Require"
Translation: 1 in 3 chance of your preferred library.
"Sass, Less, Stylus”
Translation: 1 in 3 chance of your preferred precompiled language.
“location-based”
Translation: Probably PhoneGap.
“HTML5 and CSS3”
Translation: You have “CanIuse” bookmarked.
“Demonstrated Ability…”
Translation: Will be in your job interview.
“wide range of support”
Translation: Usual attention to edge cases
“Semantic HTML” / “DHTML”
Translation: Sounds better than HTML.
“Strong understanding ”
Translation: You have “StackOverflow” bookmarked.
“revolutionizing” / “revolutionary”
Translation: Less than 5 years old.
“insanely driven”
Translation: Reads e-mail before meetings.
“stock options”
Translation: Non-redeemable compensation.
“best practices”
Translation: The design pattern/methodology that the supervising Project Manager read about.
“hackathon”
Translation: A 14-18 hour work day.
“Ping pong table”
Translation: Something you probably won’t use.
“unlimited vacation”
Translation: No Vacation.
"mandatory vacation”
Translation: Good idea.
“profitable"
Translation: We have a business plan.
"stealth mode”
Translation: We do not have a shipping product.
“SEO”
Translation: 2008 Mindset.
“design-minded”
Translation: Photoshop and Illustrator proficient.
“cross-browser”
Translation: Expect to support Internet Explorer 8.
“cross-platform”
Translation: Expect to support Windows Mobile 8.
“Internet of Things”
Translation: Job description was written by HR